Smelly Ground (Parody of Holy Ground by Taylor Swift)

farting soigne

Soigné has some very bad gas, as observed by Sinai in the following song.

I was being awesome just the other day
While having coffee not alone
But with this thing named Soigné
Whose nasty fart smelled like Beijing air
(And having a nose I obviously care)
It took off faster than a green light, go
Yeah, you get a clothespin once you already know
I ran away quickly and left my coffee behind
And that was the first time

And dear Me, it was bad
Never breathing again
And right there, where she sat
Was stinky ground.

Sputtering ’cause of all this awful gas, I had this big wide city all to escape
I block the smell of “Gross, P.U.!”
And for the first time, my nose I wanted to lose
And I guess it (finally) ended in the usual way
And the story’s got fart in every page
But sometimes I think I can still smell it now
And I smell that stench in every crowd

‘Cause dear Me, it was bad
Never breathing again
And right there, where she sat
Was smelly ground

Tonight I’m gonna breathe
For all the smells I’ve been through
But I don’t want to breathe
If Soigné’s fart comes with you
Tonight I’m gonna breathe
Like there’s no stench in the room
But I don’t want to breathe
If Soigné’s fart comes with you

It was bad
Never breathing again
And right there, where she sat
Was polluted ground

Tonight I’m gonna breathe
For all the smells I’ve been through
But I don’t want to breathe
If Soigné’s fart comes with you
Tonight I’m gonna breathe
Like there’s no stench in the room
But I don’t want to breathe
If Soigné’s fart comes with you

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Sometimes, I like to dream about talking to Sinai the Great, and I think that I'll never be able to do that. But then I remember that I can just comment on one of her many fantastic blog posts, and I immediately cheer up.

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