Category Archives: SinaiByootie INC.

Olivia Models The Next Big Fashion Fad: CAT CAPS

059

Cat caps are quite fashionable and stylish. They come in multiple sizes. The one above is XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXL, in case you were wondering. (In Fuzzie Bawttim Orinjish Pinkish Orinj™)

Watch out, hip hop shirts, there’s a new fashion trend in town.

What is this new, amazing, trendy item? It’s a cap… for your cat!

Cat caps are very comfortable and good for both warm and cool very cold weather. They are knit hats that you just plop onto your cat’s head. Cat caps are kind of hard to keep on the feline’s head, but who cares when your cat can look so cute?

Cat caps are part of Sinai Blight’s SinaiByootie INC. fashion line. You can also buy siPawlisshe™, Tayill Reens™, SinaiSüts™, and fur dye with your cat caps! Cat caps come in many, many colors. Buy all of them in case you find out that your cat hates a certain color!

THE MANY COLORS YOU CAN BUY CAT CAPS IN! Modeled by Oliveeyah Wutevirhernaimiz

054

Lait Bloo™

055

Stil Lait Butt Nawt Soh Lait Bloo™

056

Oliveeyahz Fer™

058

Oliveeyahz i’z™

Aren’t they cute? If you want to buy a cat cap, please call (123) LUV SISI and tell the operator the details: what color, what size (all of the caps above are XS, but you can also get XL, and XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXL). Depending on what type of cat you order, the price will range from $99 to $999,999. Cash only.

Advertisements
Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Stop being naked!

Do you ever sometimes feel like your tail is just a little… naked? Well I know for a fact that you have. Don’t even try denying it, because you know it’s the truth. Tails are so overlooked in fashion these days. I mean, you can get fake tail coverings, but those just make your naked tail look like another naked tail, which is kind of not okay, especially if you are trying to stop being so naked on your tail. Well, lucky for you, SinaiByootie INC. (run by your favorite rat, Sinai) has created an accessory that goes on your tail and makes your tail stop looking so naked. It’s called… The Tayill Reen™!

happysinai

What you look like before you get The Tayill Reen™: somewhat happy, but not nearly as happy as you could possibly be, as your tail is suffering the sad fate of being NAKED while the rest of you is obviously fully clothed. (Note: you are probably not this beautiful, nor will you ever be, as you are not Sinai the Great, and no one else in the world is nearly as beautiful as her.)

The Tayill Reen™ is a handy little ring that you slip onto your tail. (DUH!) All you have to do to prevent yourself from losing it is keep your tail sticking up in the air all day long and NEVER LET IT FALL TO THE GROUND, AS YOUR TAYILL REEN™ MIGHT JUST ROLL RIGHT OFF, AND YOU’D NEVER NOTICE UNTIL EVERYONE WAS LAUGHING AT YOU FOR HAVING A NAKED TAIL. That is very easy, though, and it is definitely worth tiring your tail muscles so that you do not have to walk around with a naked tail until you can find yours/buy a new one. (In case you are wondering, Sinai tried to make a no-slip Tayill Reen™, but the spikes that she inserted inside the ring ended up causing the test subject– who was not in any way related to Sinai, even distantly– some minor pain. Sinai did not want to cause her customers pain, no matter how minor, so therefore she pulled the ring. She did, however, let her test subject– who was still not even distantly related to Sinai– keep the ring if she wanted.)

The Tayill Reen™ also comes in a multitude of beautiful colors. For example, you can get it in the signature siPawlisshe color, Püpey™, or you can get it in a cool new color, which is called DharckPüpey™ (which is like Püpey™, only darker). The Tayill Reen™ even comes in some fun and peppy patterns– there’s stripes, dots, plaid, little Sinai heads, camo, gingham, paisley, check, scales, and more! (Patterns are available in both Püpey™ and DharckPüpey™ and in a unique color that is only available in patterns known as PhaydidPüpey™, which is like Püpey™, only faded.) Also, there are different finishes to the different colors (not included PhaydidPüpey™) if you don’t want a pattern, but you don’t want a plain color, either. You can get either of the two colors in sparkle, matte finish, textured, iridescent, or with Sinai’s fur in the ring (note: getting Sinai’s fur will cause the price to increase a little). But that’s not all! If you are the Divine Ruler of Everything, you can get The Tayill Reen™ in pink/purple/maroon/red/coral/orange/yellow/lime/green/turquoise/blue/indigo/24 karat gold/sterling silver (with or without patterns/special finish)! (If you are not, then you are not allowed to have fun somewhat more interesting and less barfy colors.)

3amazingcolors

Yes, these look slightly barfy. However, that does not mean that they are not also trendy. Just think of how great they would go with that booger hanging out of your nostril.

When you get The Tayill Reen™, you will feel suddenly lighter, as if you are no longer held down by the burden that your naked tail has been to your life. You haven’t noticed how heavy it is, since you have never lived without this boulder on your shoulders, or rather, your butt, but when you are suddenly relieved of it, you will be amazed at how great you feel. And who wouldn’t like to healthier and younger? Exactly!

toering

This is you after you get your Tayill Reen™. Notice how much happier you are. Also, you are positively radiant and crying tears of joy. What a lovely sight. (Note: This is not really you. This is actually Sinai the Great, in case you suddenly thought that you were close to as beautiful as Sinai is. No illusions of grandeur for you.)

Are you convinced yet? Call (123) LUV SISI to order your inexpensive Tayill Reen™ today! You won’t regret your purchase, I guarantee it! (Costs: $999.99 plain, $1999.99 pattern, $2599.99 special finish, $5999.99 Sinai’s fur special finish, $0 if you are the Divine Ruler of Everything.)

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Nail Polish By Sinai

Ever wanted some great looking nail polish to impress all of your friends with? Don’t say “no”, you know you have! After all, having pretty nails is how you become popular in this day and age! And the easiest way to get great nails/claws is to buy only the best nail polish from only the most esteemed line of beauty products – siPawlisshe™ by SinaiByootie INC., the same company who brought you SinaiWightte™ and SinaiBlaak™ fur dyes! siPawlisshe™ comes in 125, 373, 282 great, affordable colors* to decorate your claws with. Tested on real rats**, these awesome colors are just what you want. No matter what you’re feeling, there’s always a color to express yourself***! Get rid of your boring, naturally-colored, healthy nails! Replace them with interesting and funky-colored claws that everyone will be jealous of.

image

Pupey™ is just one of the very attractive and fun colors made just for you by siPawlisshe™. Your friends will be so jealous when you show off your classy looking nails.

siPAWLISSHE™ COSTS ONLY $12345678.90 PER 14 ml. BOTTLE! BUY ALL THE COLORS BEFORE THEY’RE GONE! CALL (123) LUV SISI TO ORDER RIGHT NOW!


* Only two colors are available for commoners (Pupey™ & Klierre™). Please become a universal leader if you would like to access the 125, 373, 280 colors. :)
** siPawlisshe™ tested on Soigné Blight (definitely not Sinai the Great’s sister) for reactions to colors. Soigné was not in anyway blackmailed into liking all the colors. She really likes them.
*** You must buy all the colors in order to express yourself properly. Don’t worry, they’re very affordable.

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Ask Sinai #2

Dear Sinai,

     I love your stylish and chic sense of fashion. Your fur is so sleek and cute looking. And your cute little black spot is absolutely adorable. Can you please help me become more like you? I am very ugly looking, what with my nastily boring white body and rather bland black head. (It kind of sounds like I have a lot of acne when I say that. Which is true, by the way.) I do have a little black spot, but it looks kind of stupid on my otherwise all-white belly. Also, unlike your sweet and endearing large ears, I have weird ears that are a result of being the offspring of a dumbo and regular rat. My ears are too big to be normal, but they’re too small to be cute like yours are. Lastly, my tail is very boring. Unlike your charming multi-colored tail, mine is one boring brownish-pink color. Can you please help me look more attractive? No one wants to be my friend. Not even my amazingly beautiful and lovable sister.

Swon Yhae

Dear Swon,

    You sound a lot like my sister, Soigné, so I will tell you exactly what I told her: no one can ever be as cute and charming as I am. But you can try. I would suggest buying a SinaiSüt™ ($599999.99 w/o s&h), which you wear over your normal, bland fur. It can be slightly stifling and sweaty when you wear it all day long, but it is totally worth it, since you will look exactly like me. It even adds flab to your belly so you can be pleasantly plump like me! If you are a cheapskate (like my sister), you might want to consider dying your fur. I have my own line of fur-dye colors so that everyone can look like me. SinaiBlaak™ and SinaiWightte™ are just two of the many colors I sell (two, to be exact). Each costs only $299.99 for a 2 oz. bottle (fake flab not included)! You can also buy a FaikkTayle™ ($799.99) from me. You slip it over your real tail, and it adds faux multi-colored effects to your tail. It is made of rubber, though, so it is very delicate. I would recommend not running your tail through a meat grinder while wearing it or running around in acid rain. That can be very damaging. As for your ears, I would suggest cutting off the parts that make yours look awkwardly large (but not large enough to be cute) so that you look like a normal rat. It may be painful, but you will be glad you did it later on. If you would like to learn about other products that can help make you look more like me, call (123) LUV SISI (call that number to order also). I hope this helped!

– Sinai the Great


Have a question for Sinai? Comment on any post/page on this blog, and Sinai might consider answering it.

Tagged , , , , , , , , , ,
%d bloggers like this: