Tag Archives: mouth

Sinai Helps You With the Most Challenging Task That You Will Ever Find Yourself Doing: HOW TO EAT FOOD, AN EASY GUIDE TO SUCCESSFULLY COMPLETING CHALLENGING TASKS BY SINAI BLIGHT

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Thanks to Sinai, Soigné now knows how to eat, which is quite helpful, as she would not want to starve to death, now would she?!

HOW TO EAT: AS WRITTEN BY SINAI THE GREAT

 

Step 1: Acquire food, preferably candy or something that actually tastes good.

Step 2: Hold said food

Step 2b: (Optional) Throw away food if it looks too healthy. Then get another piece of food that is nutritionally dry.

Step 3: (This is a very challenging step!) Take control of your mouth and open it.

Step 4: (This is harder than the previous step!) Insert your food into your mouth cavity. You can use your paws, or you can levitate it in.

Step 5: (This is the hardest step yet!) Bite down– that is, close your mouth– on your food.

Step 6: (Don’t feel too bad if you cannot do this at first. This is quite the challenging task.) Repeat STEP 5 with the food still in your mouth.

Step 7: While doing the extremely challenging STEP 6, swallow the food that you bite into. You have to move your muscles that the food will go down your throat. You will also swallow this slimy stuff. It is called “SAH LIGH VUH”, or something along that spelling. I have heard people also call it “SPITTE.” Don’t worry, this is completely natural.

Step 8: Lick your lips to emphasize the fact that you just ate some food.

 

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Sinai is Having a Fun Time With Her New Best Friend! (According to Sinai, At Least)

If you have been keeping up with Sinai the Great (AKA YOUR FAVORITE RAT), you will have noticed that she has a new best friend who also happens to be her sister. Now, you may be wondering what Sinai and Soigné do, what with them being besties. Luckily, you will not have to wonder any more. Here are some pictures of the two friends doing what friends do: being friends.


SINAI AND HER NEW BEST FRIEND HAVING FUN: THE PICTURES

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Here is Sinai and Soigné posing for the camera. Sadly, Soigné does not know how to pose properly, which is why she is inside Sinai’s bubble. Sinai does not really mind because that is what best friends do, you know– get in their friend’s space. Still, Sinai is thankful for her quick reflexes.

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Sinai was just relaxing when Soigné interfered by inserting her knife-like snout in Sinai’s nether regions. Sinai says that she doesn’t mind because best friends keep no secrets.

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Side view of previous picture. You can see that Sinai must hang onto the bars of the cage for support, but that’s good because that helps Sinai exercise. Exercising is good, because it allows Sinai to play more with her buddy.

004This is Soigné grooming Sinai.

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Sinai had fun getting groomed, and fortunately for her, Soigné still wanted to hang out with her. Even though the two are resting here, Soigné is showing her affection by placing her tail that is sadly not multi-colored (but she can’t help that) on top of Sinai. Awwww!

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Here, Soigné is pointing her snout up. This is obviously proof of her loving intentions because she is pointing her snout up. And pointing snouts up is great because they point up. If someone points his or her snout up, it is a clear sign that said rat wants to snuggle with you in your sleep.

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This is a shot of Soigné’s mouth with her teeth visible. As you can see, Soigné has very healthy teeth. Having friends who care about their dental health is good because it means that they don’t have halitosis.

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This is obviously a picture of Soigné sitting on Sinai to keep her warm. Soigné probably learned this love-showing tip from her I-Want-To-Be-A-Good-Friend Anonymous community group.


P.S. If you think that this post somewhat resembles Proof That Soigné is Trying to Murder Sinai? (According to Sinai, At Least), then you are out of your mind. This post doesn’t share any pictures or themes with that one! Go get your brain checked.

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Proof That Soigné is Trying to Murder Sinai? (According to Sinai, At Least)

For some strange reason, Sinai the Great, despite being the most powerful rat alive, has always had this creeping feeling in the back of her adorable and very large and not at all hard head that her so-called “sister”, Soigné, has always been plotting to kill her. She’s never been able to prove it… until now, apparently. Sinai has been taking clues from Soigné’s “suspicious and very reckless behavior”, and now believe fully that her sister is actually a secret agent from a different universe set out to murder her and take over the UNIVERSE. (Because, as you know, Sinai the is self-appointed Divine Ruler of Everything, which includes the universe.)

Sinai has been trying to find a proper bodyguard to protect her from her vicious and plotting “sister”, but unfortunately, her only personal employee is… Soigné. Which doesn’t really help when the rat she wants to protect herself from happens to be the only rat currently working for her. (Sinai could try and hire some new rats, but she says she wouldn’t trust them, because who knows if they are also secret agents for either the same universe that Soigné comes from, or even yet another that wants to conquer hers? No one, that’s who. Well, except for the possible new employees. But it’s not like Sinai would be able to trust what they would say, as who knows what their origins are?)

Anyhow, Sinai is very concerned about her life, and she feels very threatened. But is she justified? You’ll have to decide that for yourself.


WHY SINAI THINKS THAT HER SISTER IS TRYING TO MURDER HER: THE PICTURES

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Sinai was just trying to pose for the camera when her demented murderess of a sister tried to carry out her evil plans. Luckily, Sinai has quick reflexes. (Of course, she wouldn’t need them if her sister wasn’t a freaky blood lusting assassin.)

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Here is Sinai, trying to sit down and enjoy some relaxation. Unfortunately, Soigné had to interfere again… by shoving her knife-like snout at Sinai’s nether-regions. Disgusting. Not to mention the fact that Sinai never ever said that she actually wanted to sit on Soigné’s grimy face in the first place.

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Side view of previous picture. You can see that Sinai is hanging onto the cage bars for support. Poor little dearie. She’s such a kind and loving sister who has never wrongfully accused Soigné of anything, and now look what Soigné has done to show her gratitude. SHE MADE SINAI SIT ON HER.

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This is not Soigné grooming Sinai. This is Soigné attempting to perform the death bite on Sinai’s poor, innocent neck. Boo hoo hoo. Again, this is not Sinai being groomed, if that’s what you think it is. It most certainly is not. Sinai said that she is not being groomed in this picture, and Sinai has not lied a day in her life, and she certainly is not planning to start now.

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Sinai survived that traumatic experience, but unfortunately for her, Soigné is a very stubborn rodent who wants what she wants and is willing to do anything to get it. As you can see, she is trying to strangle Sinai with her disgusting and filthy monochromatic tail in this picture.

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Here, Soigné is pointing her snout up. This is obviously proof of her malicious intentions because she is pointing her snout up. And pointing snouts up is terrible because they point up. If someone points his or her snout up, it is a clear sign that said rat wants to murder you in your sleep.

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This is a shot of Soigné’s mouth with teeth visible. If she is comfortable with showing her teeth, she is probably comfortable with using them to bite innocent rats’ throats.

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This is quite obviously a picture of Soigné attempted to flatten Sinai by sitting on her. I don’t know why Soigné has this weird obsession with rats sitting on other rats, but it’s quite likely she learned it from her Assassins Anonymous community group.


So what do you think? Should Sinai be legitimately scared for her life, or is she just overreacting? Tell us your thoughts in the comments below.

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Eight Pictures of Sinai the Great’s Exceptionally Attractive and Very Beautiful Mouth (Complete With Teeth) PLUS An Exclusive Opportunity to Have a Mouth Just Like Sinai’s

Who knew? Sinai has an exceptionally attractive and very beautiful mouth (complete with teeth) that is sure to make you faint the first time you see it! (Note: You will not faint because it is ugly. You will faint because it is so lovely, and you cannot believe that such a delicate and pretty thing could ever exist.)  But what does this beauty of a mouth look like, exactly? Well look no further because below are eight pictures of the very same mouth that probably haunts all of your happiest dreams. (If you do not recall dreaming about Sinai’s dreamy, dreamy mouth, do not fret. A lot of rats have troubles with remember what they dream about. It is very likely that you have dreamed about Sinai’s teeth before, but you just can’t remember the delightful experience, which is a pity because it was probably the best thing that will ever happen to you.)


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In this picture, you can clearly see Sinai’s beautiful teeth that everyone is jealous of and wishes to have. Sadly, they are not for sale. Although, if you are interested in having a mouth like Sinai’s, you should scroll down a little further.

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Here, you can see your favorite Divine Ruler of Everything posing with her mouth open. You can also see a vicious rat whose name we cannot say nor write (due to the curse that is set upon anyone who says it) in the purple plastic rat igloo in the background, but it is easier to ignore it.

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Sinai is very good at climbing cage bars, as you can see. She is also very good at having an attractive rat mouth.

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Here is a close-up on the best thing since Sinai was born. (After her beautiful dumbo ears, of course.)

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Sinai is clearly very good at posing with her mouth open. Either that, or someone is very good at timing pictures to catch Sinai at just the right moments. (It is more likely to be the first option, though.)

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She is also highly skilled in the area of climbing on cage bars and shaking her head back and forth. What a lovely sight. I am so envious of that wonderful rat mouth of hers.

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From this angle, you can also see a close up of Sinai’s mouth, and even her dainty nostrils! What an exciting sight to behold! (Not only that, but you can also gaze upon her delightful dumbo ears and her fantastic and very sensitive whiskers that you often dream about.)

Sinai 072Here is Sinai and her lovely mouth again. Unfortunately, her beautiful mouth that makes rats all around the world faint from the shock of being able to see it happens to be in the same picture as that very same rat whose name we could not mention earlier (or now). It is a tragedy, indeed, but Sinai does not mind it, as you can clearly see that she is fighting the evil nuisance whose name must remain unspoken. We can assume that she won the fight as she is a very skilled warrior who has not lost a single battle yet.


If you would like a mouth just like Sinai’s very own stunning beauty, you are in luck! Call (123) LUV SISI any time from now to the end of eternity to receive an exclusive discount on a new mouth that looks exactly like Sinai’s! (It is made out of a very weak plastic that will probably dissolve from all your saliva in a month, but it is worth dishing out the money because Sinai has a beautiful mouth, and you know you want a beautiful mouth too.) The mouth itself costs $999,999.99, and once you get your mouth, you must find a certified surgeon to install your new body part. (We suggest Dr. S. I. Naithegreat, but you can also use Dr. Ianis Izzadochter, or Dr. Tae R. Gehtianis. They are all approved to perform the procedure.) Depending on which doctor you end up using, the surgery may cost between 1-10 (billion) dollars. As you can see, this is a very cheap procedure to go through to get your new mouth.

taylorswiftratmouth“It feels like a perfect night to get a new mouth/And look so happy/Ah ah, ah ah/It feels like a perfect day for plastic surgery/To love my new mouth/Ah ah, ah ah.”

 See?! Even Taylor Swift wants a new mouth by Sinai.* And doesn’t she look so happy to have her brand new mouth? I think she does. If you want to be fashionable, believe me, a rat mouth is exactly what you want. Call (123) LUV SISI right now to get a mouth that looks just like your favorite Divine Ruler of Everything’s!

* Taylor Swift did not really get a rat mouth. But that does not mean that you shouldn’t get one! In fact, buy a couple so that all of your friends can have them too! They will really thank you.

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