Tag Archives: polite

How To Sit Like a Lady

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You must raise your posterior in the air ever so gently so as to appear ladylike and not rude.


Ever find yourself in that dilemma where you need to sit, but you are conversing with a very famous and respected individual (ex. Sinai), and you do not want to look lowly and immature in the way you situate yourself? Well, this is the guide for you! It’ll teach you the way to properly sit and impress all your famous and powerful friends! (May not apply to non-female organisms.)

Step 1 Stare at the above picture for ten minutes before your friend arrives. This will prepare your for impressing your pal with your very proper, yet feminine, sitting-abilities. And you want to impress them. It would be even better if you stared at it for an hour or two (the more famous the visitor, the longer it is recommended to gaze).

Step 2 Get down on your belly and grovel to show that you know that you are a suborbinate to your friend. They will really like this, so even if you fail to sit properly, they will still be your friend (probably). If you don’t, they most likely will lose all respect for you, as no one likes someone naïve of their placing on the social pyramid.

Step 3 Raise your rear end in the air (as demonstrated in photo). Please do not face it towards your friend’s face or around that general area, as, though it is very polite and proper to sit with your back end in the air, no one needs or wants to look at that area of you (except for your doctor).

Step 4 Continue sitting in that position for the rest of your friend’s visit, no matter how long, unless they order you to rise. And don’t fall for any trick orders because those can lose you rrsect points. Also, prevent from distributing excretion during the visit, as that is also very unappealing and will most definitely lose you your famous and respected friend (and any money they might have been willing to leave you in their will).

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