Once upon a time, there was a very thirsty rat. Her name was Ratalise, and she looked just like Sinai the Great. (She looked like the esteemed ruler because she had dyed her fur and gotten plastic surgery to look like her.) She had not drunk any water for twenty-three minutes, and she knew if she went any longer without being hydrated, she would die and never be heard from again. As Ratalise did not see any glasses of water near to her, she assumed that she would not be living to see another day. Sadly, she accepted her tragic fate and decided to say her last words.
“I love Sinai the Great. She is the world’s best leader ever, and she is very attractive. Also, she is intelligent, cute, soft, kindly, smart, charming, funny, pretty, witty, humorous, and humble,” said the sad and resigned rat. “I just wish I could have met her before I die of dehydration, that’s all.”
Suddenly, a loud and very soothing voice boomed out from the sky. “I am Sinai the Great, Divine Ruler of Everything! You may not have known this, but I have the ability to grant wishes to other less fortunate beings, and me being the kindly and generous rat I am, I will grant you one wish,” said the pleasing voice of the best universal leader ever. “What do you desire, small and lowly subordinate who I have chosen to have a wish granted by me, only the most kind, lovely, generous, selfless, and nice rat ever to be alive? Please make it quick, as I have a spa appointment in fifteen minutes that is very urgent and must be attended.”
Ratalise was so surprised she almost fainted. It had been her life dream to meet Sinai the Great in rat, but she had not expected her heroine to grant one of her wishes. As her greatest wish, to meet Sinai the Great, had been granted, Ratalise was unsure as to what she wanted. She did not want to turn down the very generous offer Sinai the Great had offered her, as Ratalise was very grateful to Sinai for offering a wish, and she wanted to show it. After pondering what she wanted for a few minutes, the small and thirsty rat finally announced what she desired to be granted. “O greatest Sinai the Great, you are a very generous and kindly rat. Thank you very much for offering to grant a wish of mine. I will be eternally grateful, and because of this, I will name my first, second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh, eighth, and ninth ratlings after you. I spent a very large time asking myself what I desire most, as I do not want to waste your precious and valuable time on frivulous items, and I have finally come to a conclusion. The thing I would like most in the world is a well right here and right now so that I will not die from dehydration. If you could be so kind as to grant my single wish, I would be very happy and build you a temple of the ages to be worshipped in.”
“Hmmm…” said the great voice of the awe-inspiring Divine Ruler of Everything. “I don’t know if I can do a well, but I can give you a water bottle.”
“Oh, thank you!” cried the eternally grateful Ratalise as a bottle of water fell from the sky. “You have saved my life! I will never forget what you have done for me!”
Excited, Ratalise began to open her bottle of spring water. It was warm, but it was water. She wouldn’t be dying all alone of dehydration after all! She had just cracked open her bottle of water when another rat appeared.
Ratalise quickly analyzed the new rodent. She was definitely not anyone Ratalise knew, but she looked vaguely familiar. The rat was a dirty white with a black head and the dingiest looking tail ever. (It didn’t help that the tail was just one color and not multicolored like most great rodents’ are.) “Um…hello? Who are you?” asked Ratalise, wanting to know who the mystery rat was.
Flashing pristine white teeth (another sign that the rat was probably not very nice), the rodent introduced herself. “I am Siognè, an equally-evil clone. Now give me your water bottle. I desire a drink of warm water.”
“Well first of all, you are not getting my bottle of water. It is a gift from a very distinguished rat, and I do not wish to part with it. And secondly, who are you an equally-evil clone of?” inquired Ratalise while tightly clutching her water bottle. She did not Siognè, whoever she was the equally-evil clone of, to take her gift from Sinai the Great. If that did happen, Ratalise would die not only because of dehydration, but of depression as well.
“You’ll never guess!” cackled the evil rodent as she snatched Ratalise’s bottle of water and darted off.
“Noooooooooo!” cried Ratalise. Not wanting to die, she darted off in pursuit of the evil Siognè. “Give it back, you ! Give it back!”
Siognè had a head start, and she ran faster than Ratalise could, so she was quickly escaping along with the present Ratalise had received from her heroine. It was positively heartbreaking to see, and Ratalise might never have seen her water bottle again if someone had not been watching.
A rat from had a distance had watched the chase go one as she got ready for a relaxing day at the spa. She would not have done anything if the rats had not gotten so close to her living room window. When they had neared it, she realized she knew the rat who was chasing the one holding the bottle of water.
She also recognized the one with the water bottle.
With a sigh, she resigned herself to being late to her appointment, and she stepped outside.
“Stop, equally-evil clone of Soigné! I do not recall which one you are, as my sister has many, but you must drop the water bottle immediately and return it to the inferior subordinate rat chasing you, or you shall face the wrath of SINAI!” shouted Sinai the Great.
“I will never return this bottle of wa–” replied the equally-evil clone, Siognè, only to be zapped by Sinai’s EverydaySoigné™ Gun and disintegrate into miscroscopic particles immediately.
At first, Ratalise was exhausted from sprinting for such a long time. Then she was shocked at seeing Siognè immediately disintegrate. Finally, she was very grateful to Sinai the Great for saving her from the evil villain who had stolen her water bottle. “Oh, I don’t know what to say, Sinai the Great! I don’t think I will ever be able to repay you for all that you have done for me. You are truly a great rat,” squeaked Ratalise.
Sinai, being five minutes late to her spa appointment, quickly dismissed Ratalise. “Don’t bother, small subordinate rodent whose life and water bottle I have saved and who is eternally grateful to me for the good and irrepayable deeds I have done. Helping you was your payment,” boomed the great and honorable rodent. Then she snapped her fingers for a taxi to go to the spa.