What is the meaning of life? No one knows. Or at least, no one used to. Olivia Mewerly, who just so happens to be a cat, now says that she knows the answer to this tough question, and she is willing to share it.
So what is it? According to Olivia, the meaning of life is… catnip. When asked to elaborate, Olivia states, “I’m a cat, which means that I’ve lived way more lives than any of the humans out ther have. I’m on my seventh life now, and so far, the only thing in common between all my lives is catnip. Also that I have always been a cat. But everyone already knows that cats are the most important animals. However, the fact is that every time I have changed lives, I have kept onto my love of catnip. The other things come and go, but catnip is consistent. Also, the letters in ‘CATNIP’, or 3+1+20+14+9+16, add up to 63. 63 backwards is 36, and the square root of 36 is 6, which is the number of letters in ‘CATNIP’, which is PINTAC backwards, and pins and tacks hold everything together. Therefore, catnip is the meaning of life.”
Pictured above: The historical moment that everybody has been waiting for since first life has come: the meaning of life has been discovered by none other than a cute cat reflecting on her past lives.
Some people (i.e. Dr. S. I. Naithegreat) have questioned Olivia’s thoughts on this question. (Dr. S. I. Naithegreat wonders if Olivia being a cat has put any bias into this answer. She personally thinks that the meaning of life has something more to do with worshipping cute, furry rats whose names start with ‘S’ and rhyme with ‘Tie Buy Fee Trait’, but that’s just her personal opinion.) However, most who have heard this sudden realization (which was not many up to now) have generally accepted it. Dr. S. Waunyay Iztoatilee-Ronnandnotsainuy, for example, has been quoted saying: “I believe Olivia. There’s absolutely no chance that she could be wrong. Not a single chance, nope.”
Olivia says that she is now spending her time figuring out the image of time and if there is really an afterlife/afterlives (for cats). Perhaps she will find an answer to yet anoth Iztoer one of life’s biggest questions in the future.